Ruminations and Sundry Excogitations on the Decline and Fall

As I sit back in my rocker out' the porch with a jug of hooch and some jimson weed, reflecting on the past ninth months of my crazy little life, it occurs to me that I've had one laptop die on me and two C: drives catastrophically fail on a couple desktops and yet I was able to recuperate roughly 99.786% of my files, settings, sexy videos (kidding!) and yes, MY E-MAILS.

All of them. Several dating back to 2006 and more than a few archived ones dating back to the last century that were sent and received over a dial-up modem that went brrang-spliing-gleepgleepGLOORK when you logged on. Remember those?

Now, in all honesty, to recovery all those files I was required to purchase some software and a handful of new drives and especially to dedicate a ridiculous amount of time to the task, so it wasn't all easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy, but if I could just barely manage it on a miniscule budget (much to my disappointment I did not have a cash influx of 1.7 trillion dollars this year) and in a drunken stupor, just imagine how easily I could have done it if I headed a gargantuan gummit agency with a world class IT department!

Oh well, dream on, I could never hope to achieve that kind of competence...Hey! Look, a Mormon in a station wagon packed with binders full of women and a dog strapped to the roof, stuck in traffic because of a bridge closing. Stop the presses! Hold the front page!